Monday, February 28, 2011

The Red Carpet

I didn't finish watching the Oscars last night, due to my ridiculously early bed time.  Hey, a girl has to get her beauty sleep right?  And with the insane hour that I have to get up in the morning, and no guarantee of good sleep, I have to get in bed as early as I can.  Anyway, I didn't finish watching the Oscars.  Yet.

So I had this thought as I was drifting off to sleep.  I had been sitting on the couch watching, and stating my opinion of the fashion on Twitter... why?  What the hell is the big deal?

I love fashion.  I love shoes.  There are no limits as to how much I love shoes, my dears.  But why do we constantly feel the need to digest every fraction of these celebrities in their Chanel and Marchesa and Choos?

Well, I guess that wasn't the exact thought.  More, it was about the people themselves.  Is it the money?  Of course, they can afford or borrow everything they are wearing as they strut down that red carpet.  But why do we tune in to watch them smile and congratulate each other on doing such a great job? 

'Hey, Natalie!  Fantastic job playing that ballerina in Black Swan.  You were amazing and took home an Oscar and a ton of cash.  Smashing!  But did you see that Variance Report that I turned in last Friday?  I rocked that bitch.'

I don't feel like I'm accurately stating my point.  And I may not really be able to.  What makes them so damn special?  I mean, there are plenty of companies that pay their employees generously.  Those employees can probably afford to step out to the company Christmas Gala in Ellie Saab or Tom Ford, but you don't see the paparazzi there capturing each step, or misstep, along the way.

I guess what it boils down to is the age old conundrum of celebrity.  Why them?  Why the need to watch and emulate?  What makes them any better than plain Jane sitting behind a computer screen pondering the meaning of it all? 

Must be the money.  Or the shoes.

Wow I sound really jealous.  Is jealous the right word I'm looking for?  Actually, I'm just more curious.  Although it would be pretty awesome to hit a red carpet- and a few after parties.  Ha!

Thursday, February 24, 2011

What The Hell?

No, not as in that Avril Lavigne song, but more as in "What the hell am I going to do with myself when I finish this???"

My life has been filled- no, consumed- with Edward, Bella, and Jacob for like the last five days.  I may or may not have lost a grip on reality.  If I don't resurface soon, please send help.
Actually, I lied.  Don't send help.  This fog is kinda nice.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Too Much

So for the past few days my life has been consumed with planning and reading and partying and just generally trying not to screw anything up.  By the way, I'm majorly failing at that last little thing.

My Stella & Dot Launch party was Saturday.  The planning was ridiculous, but I must say that it seemed like a huge success!  My girlfriends showed up, we ate and drank and played with jewelry, and enjoyed being together.  HUGE thanks to my Mama for cooking all of the food!  And another HUGE thanks to Daddy for keeping LJ entertained!

Let it be known that it is impossible for me to plan two things at one time.  My son's Baptism is this Sunday... am I prepared?  Nope.  Not even close.  Major fail.  I don't think I even want to talk about it anymore.

So let's talk about Twilight, or I guess New Moon.  I borrowed it from a friend on Friday, started reading on Sunday and finished it on Monday.  My conclusion?  Bella is a very flat character.  And very annoying.  She didn't bother me so much in Twilight, but I found her to be completely moronic in New Moon.  Whiny.  Needy.  Overly impulsive.  And yes, I get it that she is supposed to be a teenage girl and they have a flair for the overdramatic- I know that all too well.

That said, I am totally Team Edward.  I don't even understand why there is a Team Jacob.  Maybe I was too busy being irritated with Bella to judge fairly.  Maybe the next book will change my mind.  Maybe I will go buy that book today.  If I do, then y'all won't hear from me for like... oh I don't know... 24 straight hours while I put aside all other obligations?

Am I being too hard on Bella?  I'm feeling quite overwhelmed lately and don't have much patience for anything.  If it were possible for me to go hide under the covers for a week and shut out the entire world, I would totally do it.  There isn't anything wrong, necessarily.  I just want to crawl out of my skin.  I want to be still.  I don't want to think about anything.  I have no motivation.

Maybe I'm just depressed because Jax isn't a vampire.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Weight Update

Some of you asked that I give an update on how Weight Watchers is working for me.  Well, I am pleased to announce that it is going smashingly!  And I mean that in the most awesome of ways.

Each week, I have consistently lost about 1.6 lbs.  It doesn't sound like much, but keep in mind that I'm just trying to lose that last little bit of baby weight.  So, I've lost a total of 4.8 lbs.  Let's just round that up to 5.  So, in three weeks, I've lost about 25% of what I had hoped to lose.  Not bad!

Even more importantly, being on Weight Watchers hasn't really affected the way I eat.  I actually found that I wasn't eating enough, therefore my body was retaining.  That said, sometimes it is hard to fit in my glass or two of wine without going over, but that's what the extra weekly points are for.

The website has a lot of great recipes that other members have posted.  I have two new favorites, ginger chicken and beef and broccoli stir fry.  Wow.  If that is diet food, I'll take it!  Let me know if y'all want recipes and I will be happy to post them.  Oh, and did I mention that they are fairly easy?  I think I have probably told you before that I don't cook anything that is too difficult.

Now if only I could find time to excercise ::coughcoughCouch25Kcoughcough::

The warm weather is completely inspiring me to move my ass.  As in, get some fresh air, take a walk, excercise, something!  The sunshine and 70 degree weather just feel SO good*.  Almost time to pull out the sundresses, skirts, tank tops, and sandals!  Okay, maybe not almost, but we are a lot closer than we were, darlings.

*Sorry to y'all that are still buried in snow.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Five Things: Grammys Edition

Okay, so it is a little late, but I just finished watching the Grammys last night.  And I don't care who won what.  I'm simply here for the performances and fashion.  Y'all, I have just FIVE things to say:

1.  Lady Gaga, my dear your body is effin' kick ass.  It makes me want to get back in shape and dance.  However, you have upped the- umm, how do I say this nicely- odd factor.  I wasn't really impressed by the whole egg/womb/incubation thing.  I've given birth to a child, I know how it works, I didn't need to see your interpretation.  Kthx.  Oh, and by the way, in regards to your black outfit, I think the Booty Pop is supposed to be worn under your clothes.  But kudos for trying on out anyway!

2.  I love you and your sparkly head and big peacock wannabe look, Cee Lo!  Oh, how I love it.  You made me laugh.  And you certainly seemed to be enjoying yourself.  Almost in a drug-induced way, but whatevs.  No judgement.

3.  Gwyneth, bless your heart girl.  You looked so uncomfortable in those heels.  Maybe you should have taken it down a notch before you considered crawling around on that piano.  I am certain you could have done better.  Afterall, you were super awesome on Glee.  Smoochies!  Mean it!

4.  Katy Perry, I really liked the wedding video.  It was sweet.  And I wanted to dance when you were singing Teenage Dream, even though I'm kind of sick of that song.  You are so stinkin' cute.  Even in your Armani "My Boobs Now Have Wings Dress."

5.  Mick Jagger, I was a little concerned that you came out right after they did the "In Memory" piece.  Did that bother you at all?  Anyway, you shake it like you are giving it away for free.  And you are pretty badass.

Honorable mention goes to Nicole Kidman.  How freakin' cute is she?  Singing along and dancing and just being so cute.  Oh, and Justin Bieber for having ninjas in his performance.  It kind of took the attention away from his "Would You Like To See A Wine List" white hotmess of an outfit.

I just don't have the time, nor the inclination to delve into the rest of the fashion.  A lot of the guys looked frumpy (bad hem lines) and a lot of the females looked like strippers (self explanatory).  One more thought on that subject- Nikki Minaj.  NO.  And that is pretty much all I have to say about that, just NO.  Follow me on Twitter (@ajakz) if you want my opinion on such happenings in the future!  

Monday, February 14, 2011

My Valentine

Valentine's Day!  Yay!  What does it MEEEAN?  Nothing.  Not really, anyway.  It is just another completely overcommercialized "holiday."  But it can be fun.  I guess.  Well, I mean, I already told you about my plans... burgers, fries, maybe some deeleecious leetle cupcakes.  However, I totally promised you something EPIC.  And this, friends, is a story of EPIC proportions.  And yes, I feel that the word EPIC needs to be capitalized at all times. 

Let me take you back to a hot summer night, several years ago...

I was hanging out with a friend who was going through a rough time.  She lived in this tiny ass little country town with no bars and nothing fun to do.  After a few drinks and in an effort to entertain ourselves, we called up a friend of hers.  He was hanging out at his house and invited us over.  As we pulled in to the driveway (his house is less than 5 minutes from hers and we weren't drunk), she told me that he was very cute and wanted to know what I thought.  Hence, the need for a code word, or phrase, or something completely NOT obvious.  Because who in their 20's doesn't use code words for cute boys?  Duh.

I'm sure he wondered why we were just sitting in the driveway for so long.  What can I say?  It is hard to think when you are on the spot like that.  So we settled on me telling him that I liked his truck.  Decision made.  Not obvious- he had just a plain old every day run of the mill white truck.  Just like half the people in that tiny ass little country town.  He wouldn't think I was awkward at all.

So we walked up to the door.  He answered and we walked in.  They said their hellos before turning to me.  He said hello.  In a very rushed, panicky voice I spewed "HI I'M AJ I LIKE YOUR TRUCK." 

I just realized that this story is so much better when told in person.  You can't really get quite the effect.  Oh well.  

Anyway, I thought he was such a gentleman.  He was funny.  We got along really well.  And then we did this on again off again dance for about three years.

Not exactly ever ON because he swore he didn't want a girlfriend.  And we would hang out and have a blast and I would hang on for dear life because there was some part of me that thought- against all logic and despite everything that my family and friends said, despite what HE said- that it was just meant to be.

I was right.

It wasn't easy, but it worth it.  If you've seen the movie "He's Just Not That In To You," then you know that very rarely are you the exception to the rule.  I was.  Statistics and history prove that it shouldn't have all fallen into place.

But it did.  And now we live in that tiny ass little country town.  Together.  And he loves me.

And now life is pretty dang close to perfect....

Happy Valentine's Day!  I hope you all drink lots of champagne, eat lots of chocolate, and just enjoy the ones that you love whether it is family, friends, or someone special.

Friday, February 11, 2011

All Jacked Up

It is almost weekend time, boys and girls!  Woot!  And boy do I have a lot going on.  Well, kind of, I guess.

First of all, and I am so excited about this, I am working on redecorating my den.  We just had the carpet replaced- and NO I do not even want to think about much less discuss the old carpet ::gag::- and now I'm moving on to the couches.  Instead of replacing them, I opted for slipcovers.  A much less expensive option, especially since there is nothing wrong with the couches other than the fact that they don't match and I need to brighten up the room.  Enter, my new sage slipcovers.

I hope they look good in person.

That will be project one for the weekend.  Then, we have this massive bookcase that just needs a major overhaul.  For years it held all of Jax's junk.  Now it holds all of our junk.  Mostly just DVDs, old VHS tapes, some books, pictures, and knick knacks.  It needs some organization and maybe some color because it is in the corner and really dark.  I need to Google some inspiration.  And then maybe hit Steinmart or Marshalls for some cute, cheap dustcatchers.

Oh, and I'm not really sorry to report this, but the deer are gone.  And I'm not sure that they are coming back.  However, Jax has promised me that the living room will be finished next year so that I will actually have a mantel to hang our stockings on.  YAY!

Other things on tap for the weekend: filing our taxes, attending a birthday party for one of LJ's friends (the kid is turning one, so it is really an adult party), and watching some racing.  Yes, I watch NASCAR.  And I love it.  The science behind it is pretty interesting.  And it makes for a good long afternoon nap if LJ will allow.  Oh, and the race is on Saturday night- Bud Shootout- but it means that Sunday racing is on its way!

If all that wasn't enough, I'm heading out early from work!  And picking up a keg!  And watching Tuesday night's episode of Glee!  Does it get any better than that?!  In case you are wondering, I got Jax a kegerator for Christmas year before last.  I'm a pretty dang good wife.  But he can be a good wife, too- cleaning and cooking and whatnot.  He deserved a nice kegerator.

Have a great weekend, y'all!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Sweet Stuff

I am totally a tradition person.  Maybe I've mentioned it before.  Probably.  Anyway, there is something I really like about knowing what is going to happen.  I don't really care too much for surprises.  I look forward to recreating, making better, and having some sort of clue what I'm in for.

And what could be a better time for tradition than Valentine's Day?

Pink and red and champagne and glittery sparkles of love...

Or a huge ass cheeseburger and fries.  That, my friends, is true love.  A day to not count points.  A day to stuff my face full of greasy goodness and know that my husband will still love and respect me in the morning.

And yes, I'm serious.  One of our first real dates was on Valentine's Day.  He took me to Ruby Tuesdays because that was the closest restaurant.  Don't judge.  We live out in the country.  Well, except I wasn't living with him at the time.  I was just over the moon that he had asked me out.  And for Valentine's Day!  ::swoon::

So we ordered burgers.  He got the one that is so big they have to drive a steak knife through it so that it doesn't explode all over the innocent bystanders that are precariously positioned in the booth behind him.  I was in awe.  It looked really good.  Oh, he didn't finish it.  It was just too big.  I had a bacon cheeseburger.  It was very small in comparison, but still oh so good.

Then we went back to his house and watched The Notebook.  My choice, obvs.  Do you mind if I swoon again?  PS. I would like to inform you that Noah's plantation IRL is the plantation next door to the one I grew up on.  That isn't the real house, sorry to break your hearts.  The real house is nice, though.  Also, the assisted living that Noah and Allie are in throughout the movie is the same one my grandmother was in... she lived there while they were taping.  The exterior shots are not the same place.

So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday.

And my favorite quote, the one that always makes me cry,"That's my sweetheart in there. Wherever she is, that's where my home is."  Sweet little James Gardener.  I love that old man.
Where was I?  Oh yeah.  Burgers.  Valentine's Day.  The only thing that could possibly top burgers and fries is cupcakes.  Or cheesecake.  But really, probably cupcakes. 

And just for you, my loves, on Valentine's Day I will share with you the story of how Jax and I met.  Trust me, this is one you don't want to miss.  It is EPIC.  EPIC I TELL YOU! 

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Full Of Words

I think another four letter word would more accurately describe me.  Oh well.  Let's just go with it.

I love reading blogs.  I love reading what other people are thinking, doing, feeling, etc.  It is interesting.  I have made quite a few observations, which I will share with you now because CLEARLY you want to know what I'm thinking, doing, feeling, etc.*  Right? 

There are a lot of truly talented writers out there.  And they are also interesting people.  Or maybe it is their simple attention to detail, their pictures, their willingness to put it all out there.  Maybe it is their attitude of, "I don't give a damn what you think.  I rule this fine establishment."  Anyway, I love them.

There are a lot of people who aren't really good writers, but people follow them just because.  It is totally a popularity contest.  The cute girl with her perfect life who gushes about how wonderful it is to be her (I'm talking about myself, obvs.**)

There are people who write about things that I truly don't care about.  And I skip over their blogs, but for some reason just can't take them off of my reader JUST IN CASE they surprise me and say something worth reading.

There are some that just entertain the hell out of me.  I get excited about their blogs, much as I do when I pick up a copy of US Weekly. 

There are some that just seem like awesome people.  And some that seem like they could possibly be assholes in real life.  Maybe I'm the asshole. 

Confession:  I hate Katy Perry's Firework song.  That totally makes me an asshole because it has such a great message.  And it always makes me think of Kurt Hummel from Glee, whom I love and adore- because he is real and all.  Also?  When I drive out of the grocery store parking lot, I usually realize that I have forgotten about 10 things because I didn't even put them on my list. 

I'm an asshole.

Oh yeah, and I don't write eloquently.  Sorry.  I just kind of vomit all over the page and you get what you get.  And I rarely post pictures because my computer is old as dog shit and I'm lazy.  There you go.

I'm always full of things that I want to say, but I don't want to drone on and be boring.  I try to be a good person and have an awesome life- because I really do- but I don't think you really want to hear about how spectacular it was when, in truth, it was just a normal day.

I look forward to reading blogs every day, or almost every day.  I even look forward to writing, most days.   And yes, sometimes even posting pictures.  Then sometimes I just want to hide under the covers and take a really long nap. 

*I am not delusional enough to think this, really.  I'm sure you are all just bored and have nothing better to do at this particular moment, so you stopped by to see what I'm whining about today.
**Not really.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Not So Appropriate

Kind of like inappropriate.
I'm no prude, but listening to someone from my company (who will remain nameless, but she is pretty high up on the food chain) talk about her teenage daughter and referencing ::ahem:: blow jobs and crack are not my idea of a good time.  Sure, you can joke with girlfriends about that kind of stuff.  But sitting around a conference table, while finishing lunch with other coworkers, makes for an uncomfortable situation.

Cue the awkward laugh.

Of course there were more stories to follow.  Each one quite unpleasant with it's sexual innuendos.  And she chortles like a... well, something that chortles.  Not that I was offended because I wasn't.  Most people enjoy a good story about a preacher and nuts (actual cocktail nuts, but it came with a sausage), right?

Sorry Mr. Peanut. 

I mean, I guess it is a good thing that we have all worked together for so long that she feels comfortable, but I don't really care for things like that in what should be a professional setting.  Skeevy. 

When I go to my friend Daina's bachelorette party in a few months I say, "Bring on the penis straws and condom veils!"  Well, probably not, but if anyone wants to I will not be offended or anything.

And because I've mentioned it every other day, I'm still waiting.  I know I said this week, but it is looking like two or three more weeks.  So let's just drop the subject, 'mkay?  Thxbai.  XOXO

Thursday, February 3, 2011

No More Blob

My baby... he's growing up.  It is hard to be sad because, duh, it is what he is supposed to do.  And it is truly a wonderful thing.  When I come home I am just plain exhausted from sitting behind a desk all day and being in the car for what seems like an eternity (hour and a half both ways).  It is like a shot of adrenaline to see him grinning from ear to ear and bouncing up and down and reaching out his arms for me to pick him up.  He gets so excited. 

He isn't my little blob anymore.  He babbles a little and has different facial expressions.  And for the most part, he is just so dang happy.  Oh, unless he is hungry.  That boy LOVES to eat.

I put him in the highchair a couple of nights ago to feed him.  Y'all before I could even sit down he had opened his mouth so wide I could have put the whole bowl in there.  And I SWEAR he was practically vibrating.  He was shaking!  Poor thing seemed like he hadn't had a meal in months (I promise we feed him, quite regularly!)

In the mornings, he looks over to his bookcase where we keep his teddy bear.  He wants it and knows exactly where it is.  He is even working on crawling.  Well, he mostly just rocks back and forth.

How did this happen?  I know everyone has always told me that it goes by so fast, but it is unbelievable to me that in four and a half months that blob that I brought home from the hospital- the one that kept me up at all hours of the night, the one that I could tote around in one arm, the one that just stared at me because he didn't know what to make of me in much the same way that I didn't know what to make of him- will be a year old.

He has such an amazing little personality.  And he still snuggles in to me when he is sleepy.  And he still stares at me intently, but now I think he gets it.  I think I'm getting it, too.

My sweet boy- and he does have a diaper on, it is just hard to see

Poor quality.  Jax gets irritated when I use my Blackberry and not my nice camera.  But sometimes my camera is in another room.  And my BB stays attached to my hand, pretty much.

I'm still waiting y'all.  As patiently as possible....

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

I Should Tell You

And this is not an announcement, just a statement of fact.  I do not play the waiting game well.  AT. ALL.  As my granddaddy used to say, "I have a lot of patience because I never use any."  That describes me pretty dang accurately. 

So, here I sit... waiting. 

I am doing everything in my power to concentrate on other things.  Work, writing this, playing solitaire (don't tell anyone, please), daydreaming about- well, nevermind.  The point is that I am slowly, but surely, running out of things to keep me distracted.  HALP!

The good news?  It is 70 and sunny here today!  Holla!  Unfortunately, tomorrow will be in the 40's and rainy.  It hardly seems fair.

Y'all, I have just realized that I have resorted to writing about the weather.  And it isn't like we are having the Snowpocalypse like up North or Midwest and wherever else.  Non-weather weather.  I should just give up writing altogether.

I will praying for the waiting game to be over, and I'm sure y'all will be praying just as hard so that maybe I will have something interesting to say.  I'm just gonna peace out now.  XOXO

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Something New

Alright, I've kept y'all in the dark long enough.  Here we go.  My first big announcement of the week....

I am beyond pleased to announce that as of today I will be a Stylist for

The jewelry is so ridiculously gorgeous!  And who doesn't like a fun get-together with the girls?!  If you are in the Charleston area and would like me to help you plan a party, please contact me.  And if you aren't in the Charleston area, we can absolutely plan an online party! 

If you aren't familiar with Stella and Dot, feel free to check out my website  You won't click that little red X without falling head over heels for at least 10 different things, trust me!

I am so excited!  And if my luck continues the way it has been going for the last week, I am going to have something utterly amazing to tell you later this week.  Maybe as soon as tomorrow!  If my luck changes, and everything goes bust, don't worry I will most certainly be telling you about that, too.

Okay, fine, you are tired of reading my drivel... you are now free to go drool over Stella and Dot.  Let me know what you think!